Weekend past

This past weekend was very stressful.

It was a dance festival this weekend and eventhough, we are adequately staffed, it could be better.

Because I am operations and promotions of this joint, I have to be here morning and night to make sure volunteer ushers, or volunteer concession show to help with our FOHouse Managers or our concession staff, and if they dont, then I have to step in. Needless to say, it was a VERY long weekend and this week is not any easier.

The good thing about it all is that I am raking in a TON of overtime! This means the summer off is looking very, very good!

This week I am farm sitting. Grace and Wilmer went to their other house in the mountains, to get it ready to the summer.

It`s nice because I can spend time with the horses and not have to worry about anyone catching me kissing their fuzzy noses, or scratching their ears while I whisper to them, or give them a smooch by the soft part of their eye and tell them that I love them.

Its nice to be able to let them hang out with me while I sit on the ground as they stand above me,(almost like they guard over me) or I will fill the trough with oats, while I have a lawn chair set up in the middle of it reading a book, while they nibble around me. They nibble over my boots, and up my leg, then nose over my lap until they hit the pages of my book. Its calming for me. I welcome it and I miss the daily doses I used to get.

Soon, I keep reminding myself.

Legs and I will have the house built by fall. Things are falling in to place by leaps and bounds since we dumped the log house idea. We had one person, then she had an episode of some sorts and then we were handed off to another person, only having to start all over again, and then in February, we were hit again with another person, who we had to start all over AGAIN with. That was the last straw.

We approached our general contractor who offered to do only the inside as he was not familiar with log houses and the chinking and all the other stuff that came with it. Since we scrapped the whole thing, he agreed to take on the house in its entirety and its now happening so fast, even Legs and I can`t keep up! It`s great!

Now, I am back from lunch, waiting for the CEO`s to arrive for this afternoons hush hush meeting with some oil company.

This evening will be a welcomed free one and you can bet, I will be outside with the horses!

52 of 365

1). Drinking water

2). Stairs at work (keeps me in shape)

3). Fried Onions with butter

4). Sitting on my unbroke 3 year old horse while she is laying down,and is trying to have a nap in the warm sun but can't cuz I'm bugging her!

5). Spending time outside in the sun with my 4 legged kids (its pure heaven)

Not much

You know, if it wasn't for bad luck, I would have no luck.

When I think about it...I would welcome the "no luck".

This week has been crap.

I don't feel good due to these damn allergies and I just feel like if God gives me one more test, just one more stinkin' challenge, I am going to commit myself to the nearest insane asylum.



a⋅sy⋅lum 

[uh-sahy-luhm]–noun

- (esp. formerly) an institution for the maintenance and care of the mentally ill, orphans, or other persons requiring specialized assistance.

- an inviolable refuge, as formerly for criminals and debtors; sanctuary: He sought asylum in the church.

- International Law.
a.
a refuge granted an alien by a sovereign state on its own territory.
b.
a temporary refuge granted political offenders, esp. in a foreign embassy.

- any secure retreat.

51 of 365

1). Coffee (eventhough I can't drink it - I can still smell it)

2). Gin and Tonic

3). Allergy medicine

4). Easy listening CDs

5). Praise for doing a good deed

the good ol' days.

Remember Chico and the Man?

A little of this and a little of that.

Well, the car is fixed.

I am speaking to Legs again.

My allergies are outta control.
My face today feels like it is sliding off. I'm sniffling, even after I took my "nose snort" drugs.
My eyes are sore and teary, and my head is fuzzy. Drat!

On a good note, I have managed to lose 4 pounds. I am back on my protien diet. I know, I know, I still have the odd carb. No worries.

I have aerobics tonight and a birthday party to attend.

Legs and I have been invited to three weddings this year. One in June, one in July and one in August.

I am missing the one in June because I have foolishly offered to part take in a one act play and have foolishly offered my directorial skills for another. Dumb, dumb, dumb....
The play I am in is called "The Sandbox" by Edward Albee in which I will be playing "Mommy". and the other one that I am directing is a comedy.

July is the one wedding I am most looking forward to. The bride is a good friend of mine and I work with her at the hell job.

The August wedding will be an interesting one as the bridesmaids are feuding! Cracks me up.

Hopefully by then, and if Legs and I haven't killed each other by then, the house that we are planning to build will be well underway.

The blueprints are being drawn up as we speak. We initially started out with a log house, but were jacked around by the log house company for the last year and a half and we have had enough. We found ourselves a general contractor here in the Border Town and he is willing to take the project on...so now we are happy.


Things are looking up.

TheatreFest is almost here, which means I am able to take some time off from the neverending job. It feels like March is lasting FOREVER....April is going to be even worse, so the break is welcoming.

I am farm sitting this weekend, well actually for the next ten days. I am happy about that too. I will be able to spend time with my four legged kids. Maybe get in some hoof trimming, worming, and maybe even a few training sessions with the unbroke horses.
I will be able to do my homework with them too, as I have just recently started taking equine massage therapy. The last week in September is when the tests come, so I have much memorizing to do before then.

Well, updates are done, should get back to work...
We have the Ukraininan Dance Festival here at work this weekend....ugh.

Must go move some tables.

50 of 365

1). being proud of the fact that I looked after myself!

2). Daffodils - spring is here?

3). The "Here Vicki" bird, singing her song in the trees.

4). Farm sitting for a week.

5). talking to my dog on the phone and then listening to her happy "talk"back to me. Breaks my heart. I miss her so much.

Can it get any better?

Yesterday, I took the day off.

I cleaned out my closet and was finally able to let the two dresses that I wore to my grama and grapas funeral go.

Grapa has been gone now for 12 years and my grama 4 years. I am proud of myself.
The dresses were nice, outta date, but still held that pain.

I let it go.

Today....
Today is a different story.

I started my car and drove one block from my place. The back seat is loaded with 3 garbage bags. Two containing the clothes from the closets and one bag has my bottles and cans in it.

The car sputtered, and stalled. Great.

I call Legs. He should be at work, he works on vehicles and machinery, he might have some insight on what could be wrong, PLUS, I am a little panicky because I am NOT in the good part of town.

Why is it, that when there is something wrong with your vehicle and you call the better half, YOU GET SHIT! Why?

It's not my fault the car stalled, its not my fault I am where I am.

I asked him what his CAA number was so I could call the tow truck and get it taken to MY mechanic. Well, he started cussing and swearing and ranting...and then when I barked back, he got mad at me for being outta control. All I asked was for the CAA number!

So, I hung up on him.

What the hell?

He called back and I really debated on answering it, but I answered anyway. I got his CAA number and THEN I hung up! Screw him!

I am sick to death of being talked to like I am stupid, dumb, and an idiot. I may not be the brightest person alive, but gimme SOME credit.

SO, I am stranded on the bad side of town!

My landlord just happened to be driving by and stopped. He offered to take me to the CAA truck towing place so I hopped in.

I made arrangements and got him to drop me back off at me car.

I waited for the tow truck and am still trying to re-start my little blue smurf turd car, but no luck.

I then called the boss, he came and picked me up, in the meantime I texted Legs and told him that I was not speaking to him anymore if he continued to talk to me like I was an idiot and that Oh by the way, I got the house plans done and since I was inconveniencing HIM, that I was making the changes on the house and if he wanted to "discuss" the plans he could call me at work.

AND I called CAA and bought my OWN card, with my OWN number!!!


I was quite proud of myself....again.

I got to work, and Legs called.

He asked me how I made out. I told him fine...and said nothing more.

I faxed the house plans to his dad's place and told him that's what I did, if there were changes, he could fax me back here at work and that I was not discussing anything further with him until his attitude changed and hung up.

I haven't heard from him yet today.

Great.

And how was YOUR day?

49 of 365

1). Having a crisis and rather the better half rescuing you, your landlord does.

2). Having the boss buy you dinner, cuz he feels bad for you.

3). Having a great mechanic who gives you deals cuz your single, left by your mean rotten ex. (well that's what he thinks)

4). Having the FOH mgr. take you home tonight after the show is over.

5). Having a great box office guru looking up CAA numbers for you, while you are stranded with no phone book.

Changes.

I remember when I was about four and my mom dropped the babysitter and I off at the new Flintstones' movie at the theater uptown. I had serious abandonment issues when I was little, with "the father" dumping us and plus I was on meds that were not "meshing", so I was not only messed up emotionally, but my drugs were working against me as well.

After mom dropped us off, she had some shopping to do uptown. I knew she would be at the Co-op. The babysitter and I went in, bought tickets, sat down, and she took off her jacket and was about to take off mine, when I went into this "fit". I bolted. I ran out of the movie theater and ran, and ran. Now this is small town Saskatchewan and everybody knew everybody.

I ran, and ran scream crying down the sidewalk, screaming for my mom. My arms were outstretched in front of me and it seemed like I ran forever. My babysitter caught up with me and I was hysterical. She caught me at the corner of the 4-way stop. I remember people just staring at me like I was nuts. I was hollering for my mom and for her not to leave me.

At 37, in my head, I still feel like I am running. Scream crying with my arms out infront of me, not knowing where to go, having no idea on how to get there. I am not sure "where" is.

Lost.

I always feel lost.



I gotta make some changes 'round here.

Today is the day.

48 of 365

1.) a day off

2). Sleeping in

3). and afternoon nap

4). pancakes

5). Monday night t.v.

Frost warning!

The forecast for work today is a little chilly.

Make sure if you step inside, not to remove any scarves, coats or mittens. It is well below zero indoors.

If you have extra earmuffs, slippers and socks please ration and hand out if absolutely necessary.

I repeat, work today - a little chilly!

DO NOT GO INDOORS! Hazardous to your health. Cover all exposed skin areas!

This just in.....

This picture was just dropped off at our location - the box office.

This photo was taken upstairs in the lightning tech room!

Whew!!! Very chilly up there!!!

47 of 365

1). believe it of not...the cafereria food at the College.

2). a fab hair day

3). left over stew

4). the hole in my car getting fixed

5). earrings

Funny

Yesterday was the day that "J" was going to have me fired.

Well.

I am still here.

"J", however, made an ass of himself infront of us all, including the board members.

He is not a happy camper today.


Awwwww.....

Happy St. Paddy's Day!!!

46 of 365

1). watching other people make asses of themselves.

2). watching t.v. while curled up in a blanket

3). the colour yellow

4). roll up the rim to win coffee

5). Theatre Festival

Eloping is the only way

This last Saturday, I spent the whole, entire day talking to soon-to-be-brides about using our venue as a place to get married in.

I saw stressed out young brides, over confident older brides, moderately stressed future mother-in-laws (is that the right spelling or is it mothers-in-law?...anyway...) and mothers of the bride just along for moral support.....and the conclusion I have come to is this.....

Elope.

e⋅lope 
–verb (used without object), e⋅loped, e⋅lop⋅ing.
1.
to run off secretly to be married, usually without the consent or knowledge of one's parents.
2.
to run away with a lover.
3.
to leave without permission or notification; escape.


Just elope!

Go someplace warm, tropical, and secluded.
Those who want to join you can, those who don't well that's fine too.

I saw these future brides, changing their minds once they saw different colour schemes, bows added to this, feathers added to that. Do you have taped music or the real thing? They saw other dresses and then hemmed and hawed over something different yet again. YIKES!

One thing that I know, THAT I KNOW, is that I will be eloping!

45 of 365 Days of Grace

1). Homemade stew

2). Tim Horton's

3). Rollie office chairs

4). Being able to read a chapter on a book without falling asleep after reading the first page!

5). Tolerating stupid people

44 of 365

1). Weight loss

2). Water

3). glad to have the hell job

4). my horsey - BonBon

5). finding the heater valve to turn off

What the Duece?

So living on the border is not necessarity a good time.

I have had to endure the Alberta Blue Cross (ABC). Not fun.

I am now dealing with the Saskatchewan Blue Cross (SBC). Fun.

I always knew being in Saskatchewan had WAY MORE perks than Alberta, but try to tell that to anyone else. You have to experience it yourself in order to really appreciate good ole Saskatchewan and its health benefits!!

I have been in tormoil over my teeth. You need your teeth! Not only for just everyday things but also for the "extras" as well. You can't do a television interview with no teeth, unless you want to be on Jerry Springer. You can't be on stage either in a play or emcee without your teeth! I mean come on, think about it.

Teeth are a requirement. So get dentures, get braces.

I am now fighting with the ABC about a crown I need. They just don't cover it. I know some call it cosmetic, but if its in the back, who is gonna see it? I work on the Alberta side and live on the Saskatchewan side. My work covers the ABC. BUT....the SBC covers crowns in the third year for being with them. AND the ABC, they are kinda tricksey about telling you what coverage you have. Very tricksey, very tricksey.

Now, we will have to play the waiting game.

43 of 365

1). Being able to cancel a dental appointment with 12 ours notice.

2). having the knowledge to be able to burn a near to impossible audio cd - me smart cookie

3). fries and gravy

4). Paul McKenna diet rules

5). Facebook

For shammmmmme...

I am a bad, bad girl.

I feel guilty...well, almost. Ok, I do.

I have been very neglectful of my "lifelines."

I am sorry.

I am missing out on some really funny stuff and I am missing out on what's been happening in your lives.

I will try to keep up better.

Really.

Sorry.

Do you forgive me?

42 of 365

1). A day off.

2). Deworming the horses and knowing they are healthy and happy.

3). Making shake-n-bake chicken for supper.

4). Reading a good book.

5). Hearing a great 80's tune on the radio - Girls just wanna have fun.

The Straw broke....a rant.

Once again, I thought I was done with the piddly-assed high school horse shite! Seriously.

Yes, it was a fairly stressful day yesterday at work with a gazillion children coughing on you, touching you with their cheezy chip little fingers, grabbing at others, parents stressed out and yelling at their disobedient kids that are running all over hell's green acre....and I, stuck behind the merch. table. For those of you who know me, know I can not "do" money....and that's where I was. Thank heaven for the fabulous volunteer ladies who helped me. If they were not there to back me up, I would have been in a corner freaking out!

Yesterday we had the two out of the three fab Front of House Managers (FOH) there, Jack Spratt and G-Girl. The one I hate ("L" who is married to "J") did not grace my presence yesterday, but her arsehole of a husband who is the lighting tech and works there full time was.

J approached G-Girl yesterday, who was our FOH for two of the shows and said to her that I was in a lot of trouble and will most likely be fired on Monday for the ruckus I caused. G-Girl, who has grown to be a good friend of mine, came to me with this information and asked if I was in trouble....I shook my head no.

G-Girl informed me that she was told by J that eventhough the kids show was sold out, there were still ads in the paper for the show and I was foolishly spending money that our non-profit organization did not have and that he was going to bring this HUGE mistake to the boards attention and have me fired.

Well, I was wild!

First of all if you have a problem with me, come and see me. I am forever hearing of these guys back stage beeotch and complain about me, but not once have they evah, evah, had the balls to approach me.

Secondly, stop telling others....they MUST know it's gonna get back to me?! I mean really! I am a nice person and people really, actually like me! (I'm not pulling your leg here!)

and Thirdly...and this is the best and I can hardly wait for J and R to bring it up at the next meeting....teehee...the show that had all the ads in, was not our show. They brought themselves in. I have no part whatsoever in what they do for advertising. None. Zero. Zilch. I have no say, in what they do...and I don't care. It's not my job to see how they spend their advertising dollar. We didn't bring it or book it in.

What keeps me going? The fact that I lurve my job and I do it well. The fact that I know by being there, drives J and R and L crazy!

Back to back

Today is gonna be one of those days you just know could be better.

Today is the day The Backyardigans arrive at my work place.

Today is the day that we are sold out on 3 shows.

Today is the day that there will approximately 1300 children here (ages 2-5) with parents.

Today is gonna be a long, long, long day.

41 of 365

1). A great salad that you made yourself

2). Finger rings

3). Cameras

4). Finding the best in a day you KNOW is gonna suck

5). Volunteers

Shy

Well, I look back and I was shy, yes shy. I still am to a degree. Some people take me for being bitchy, but basically, it is just being shy. I'm quiet until I get to know you, then you can't shut me up. I'm not smart. I'm not completely stupid. I think I am just regular. Nothing exceptional, nothing dissappointing.


Shy
–adjective
1.
bashful; retiring.
2.
easily frightened away; timid.
3.
suspicious; distrustful: I am a bit shy of that sort of person.
4.
reluctant; wary.


I am one of those people who don't normally go into a crowded room, guns a-blazin', making everyone aware that I have arrived. I am also not one of those people who go running to see the attention getter either. I am also not one of those people to start a conversation. I will join in, but will never start one.

I am one of those people who will not eat by themselves. I will order room service instead and eat in my room, or order take out and go back to my office.

I have just recently started to venture out on my own. I did go to a movie by myself. Kinda scary, but liberating too. I do go walk on the track at the gym by myself. I go with my MP3 player and listen to music as I walk. I'm not comfortable doing it, but I go.

Last week, I went by myself to a ladies workout class. I knew no one and it was really scary. I'm not sure I'll do it again.

I am supposed to go to Festival in April. I am meeting up with my friends but am not able to sit with them. In fact, I have no idea where they will be sitting and it scares me. I will be arriving late on Wednesday night and will most likely meet them at the green room. I love them to death, and I know its good for me to go by myself, but I know they just don't get it. They don't get that I would sooner curl up in a ball in the corner than have all eyes turn and watch me walk in. I know that doesn't happen, but that's what I perceive happens.
They are very confident people, at least to me they are, and I just don't know if they don't get it (cuz they don't think like that) or just don't have the patience for it.

It IS different on stage or infront of a camera. You are not you. You are your character, and if you do your homework right on your character, it is easy to be someone else. You "become" that character. Some people may beg to differ, but I have been on stage for many years, in many different costumes, some I would not be caught dead in, in "real" life!

Anyway, Since I have been on my own now for a few years, I am kinda getting set in my ways, and this is one way I am really not fond to be in. Not liking large crowds, not liking a sense of not being found. Getting lost. Never being found. Its a horrible feeling.

Must work on getting out by myself more. I guess going in April to Festival, may be a good start.

I know some people would say that I don't project those feelings at all. Well, I may not look it on the outside. Its a pretty good front! But on the inside, I am about ready to die a thousand deaths.

Well, gotta start somewhere! Right?!

40 of 365

1). A good boss

2). What's good for the goose is good for the gander - pay back

3). Fridays

4). Other people who have patience when I have a blonde moment that lasts for quite some time

5). Bestest Friends

39 of 365

1). Hot Fudge Sundaes

2). Gap Jeans

3). Pictures of my mommy and me

4). Car locks

5). Non blustery days

Its Legs' turn....

Borrowed this from Wilma, who inturn, borrowed from someone else and I thought it was cute.


1. He’s sitting in front of the TV, what is on the screen?
House

2. You’re out to eat; what kind of dressing does he get on his salad?
nothing, plain Jane for him.

3. What’s one food he doesn’t like?
Onions

4. You go out to eat and have a drink. What does he order?
Double Gibson's on the rocks

5. Where did he go to high school?
St. Wallyburg, Saskatchewan

6. What size shoe does he wear?
10.5

7. If he was to collect anything, what would it be?
Guns

8. What is his favorite type of sandwich?
Ham on white...NO MAYO!

9. What would this person eat every day if he could?
candy...any kind of candy

10. What is his favorite cereal?
Rice Krispies

11. What would he never wear?
Twenty X Jeans

12. What is his favorite sports team?
Doesn't like sports

13. Who did he vote for?
Green Party....likes to be different

14. Who is his best friend?
Dusticle

15. What is something you do that he wishes you wouldn’t do?
Nag

16. What is his heritage?
Kraut all the way!

17. You bake him a cake for his birthday; what kind of cake?
Chocolate with candies on top

18. Did he play sports in high school?
Football and Hockey

19. What could he spend hours doing?
Cleaning and adding things to his rifles

20. What is one unique talent he has?
Has bionic type strength in his arms and can lift the front end of a car. Its crazy...and really why would you do it? Guess that's why its unique!

38 of 365

1). People who call back

2). honestly

3). The colour orange

4). My watch Legs gave to me. No rash as of yet!

5). Quitting time at work

Wanna See

I wanna see this movie!!!!!

One Week with Joshua Jackson.

37 of 365

1). McDonald's French Fries

2). My car

3). Future performance bookings....me happy, me have job!

4). Eggplant

5). Pencils with erasers!

36 of 365

1). A night out with the girlfriends

2). no hang over

3). smokies on a bun with lotsa mustard

4). calendars

5). CD writables