Where to begin....

ITs been so long since my last post....the time has gone by quickly. Many things have happened.

- mom had open heart surgery the last part of January. She had a valve replaced and one repaired. During that time, I went home to look after the farm and travelled over two hours (one way only) every second day to go see her. Before I went home, the tramsmission on my car went and had to go to the shop, where I had a melt down in order for them to give me a loaner to go back home...this thing was a gas guzzler! They gave me a truck and were kind enough to let me have it for as long as I needed. It was very nice of them!!!

- while tending to the farm, some asshole proceeded to take advantage of my mom being in the hospital by calling the SPCA and reporting us for having 4 dead horses in the yard and that the horses were being neglected because whomever it was that called the SPCA, knew my mom was in the hospital, but had no clue that I was home....or so I thought. I have since found out who called the animal rights people and have not spoken to that person since...did the SPCA find anything at the farm you ask? NO. Does the person who called SPCA know that I know they called them...NO. I am just waiting for them to slip up.

- during this time, with mom in the hospital and the SPCA on my back, I had a phone call from a Welfare case worker. After my uncle died - Im the executor - he left in the will that his girlfriend would live in the house as long as bills were paid and the yard was looked after. IN the meantime, the girlfriend got sick and was very close to death, but was being looked after by her family....so I thought. I get a call from the bank saying that if the mortgage on the house was not paid in 45 days the house would go into foreclosure. I freaked. I called the daughter of my uncles girlfriend and nothing was looked after, no bills paid, no mortage paid...nothing. I immediately called the lawyer handling my uncles estate. In the meantime, the daughter went to welfare and told them the only way her mom/my uncles girlfriend could move back in to the house is if the furnace got replaced. While that was going on, the daughter called me and told me her mom is moving in with her and her husband, which meant I got stuck with the bills and the mortage...I was furious! All of a sudden, I get a call from a welfare case worker inquiring about installing a furnace at my uncles house. I was perplexed as was the case worker when I told her that my uncles girlfriend was moving in with her daughter...the case worker told me that the house was the daughters and she was re-renting the house back out! I lost it! The daughter managed to get all the bills but into her name - the power, the telephone, the electric...everything and was indeed planning to re-rent the house out.

I called the lawyer...I was wayyyy in over my head.

Let's recap....mom - heart surgery
my car - no tranny
SPCA - animal abuse
sneaky daughter - illegally renting a property not belonging to her
anything else???

OH ya, did I forget to mention, that I was planning on getting married?
WHile all of this is going on, we booked a vacation with Wilma and her better half, and Bruno, with his better half plus myself and my better half!

AND.....I managed in the meantime to get half the herd sold, we went from 31 horses to 16! Managed to get my cousin to start paying her share of the feed bill and managed to get my lazy-assed Aunt to get rid of her horses that she abandoned leaving my mom to look after!!

I did however lose my marbles, once again and had to see the doc for stronger happy pills. He said that I endured events that should have happened to a person within a 2 year span - happen in two weeks. By the time Mexico rolled around, my shakes disappeared but my food was not able to stay down all the time.

I think through all of this the one thing that I will remember is that one particular day that I went to see my mom, my gut told me to take someone with. I asked a family friend if she wanted to come and she did. When it was time for us to leave - visiting hours had ended. My mom was sitting in her chair saying see ya later and all of a sudden, she fell over.

Her eyes...I will never forget her eyes as long as I live.

I was with my grama when she passed. It was peaceful. I was content.

My mom - that was terrifiying. She slumped over in her chair and you could see, you could literally see the life leave her eyes. Laurie (the friend), caught her, while I started screaming to the nurses..."my mom, my mom, you have to help my mom"...there was a sea of blue in her room. Nurses, doctors...all surrounding my mom. Laurie was shoved out the door and I somehow was trapped in the room...I think I black out, the next thing I remember was seeing the crash cart in the the room and I....thats all I remember....I then remember being in a room with Laurie and another couple. I would not calm down, I didnt want to sit. I wanted to die.
This other woman came over to help Laurie with me and a nurse rushed in, grabbed me and Laurie and took us to a quiet room. A social worker walked in and gave us water...what seemed like only a few seconds was actually 15 minutes. A nurse stuck her head in the room and finally told us they had a pulse. 5 minutes later we went in to see my mom.

Because I am such a believer in the afterlife, and after I told my mom that she scared the hell out of me and to never do that again, I asked her what she saw.

She said the only thing she remembers is the blackness and hearing the panic in my voice, calling the nurses and the next thing waking up and seeing all the nursing staff around her.

February 2-12 was Mexico
We spent two fabulous weeks in a beautiful house called Casa Azul Profundo
The staff was wonderful, the days were bright and sunny and I was with 5 of my best friends.
We went zip lining, horse back riding, shopping, fishing and OH it was welcomed!!!

and so ends the first chapter.....